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July 28th, 2010 Writing the World Anew
When most folks are sleeping, I'm writing. I love it. I love writing and I love living the fullness of a day, then giving part of my night to extend my self and my understanding further than the next person. I guess it's my competitive edge. Maybe it's a part of my upbringing, where my parents taught us we had to be better than good, basically twice as good as the next person who might have society's favor as an advantage. Maybe it is something as simple as I love what I do, so I'd like to do it for as many hours a day as I possibly can. I think it's a little bit of all of those things. Tonight, in my personal journal I'm writing about worth. This subject is at the forefront of my mind because it was the main idea of a conversation a few friends and I had last week. Then tonight the thesis of that conversation was amplified for me. Last week my friend (a male) said a person will be treated in accordance with what they believe their worth to be. The person's beliefs will be manifested in their actions and permitted interactions. I believe that to be true. Tonight that truth was amplified for me. I attended a meeting for a production my daughter is participating in. The production is an annual affair which intentionally showcases the talents of persons of "varied abilities." This variance is made up of people of different physical abilities, cultural perspectives, ages, and genders. The meeting was a powerfully normal gathering. It made my heart smile. On an outdoor terrace of a downtown highrise, several folks sat gathered around tables munching on fruit, drinking lemonade and conferring about the upcoming production. It was a world within a world - no judgment, no living within stereotypical lines or boxes, no pretending not to notice differences - just folks being their complete "as is" selves. I wish you could've seen it - felt it. So tonight I'm writing about folks understanding their worth, embracing their whole selves, understanding that there is value in each unique creation. I'm jotting notes about appreciating and caring for self - first; then giving to make life better for others. My daughter's mentor in the program is a beautiful woman who uses a wheelchair. This woman is amazing. She had polio as a child. That's all to say about that - childhood is evidently the only chapter polio dominated in her life. Polio took her ability to walk, yet she dances (runs a dance company) and drives, and lives a big life, and even goes up in planes to skydive! She is an inspiration, with her lovely hair cut, stylish clothes, and delicately diamond-embellished manicures and pedicures. :-) Also, the woman has raised a son who is doing his residency as a doctor. Oh, she's no joke! While she is formally mentoring my daughter, she can't begin to imagine what her life is teaching me. Lesson 1 for tonight - There are no excuses. :-) Lesson 2 - forget passive existence; use more of yourself. Lesson 3 - Live like you appreciate being alive. Lesson 4 - embrace differences (no carbon copies allowed). Try it! Be easy, Kim D. ********************************************************************** July 27th, 2010 Formal Education... There is one week left in the Summer school semester - three projects to completion. I am so excited about making my way through this program. When I stop to think about it, I don't know how I was able to manage it. My mother passed during my enrollment. I ended a longtime relationship. I moved. I had to buy a new car. I'm telling you there are many things that seemed to drop in the middle of the road on this journey, but somehow I'm still moving. Yay! I'm having some fun, learning a lot, working very hard, and living well. Okay, so anyway... let me recommend a good book I recently read: Response to Intervention - A Practical guide for Every Teacher. This is a non-fiction book primarily for educators, but it contains information about school practices that will blow the mind of any parent or community leader. The info relating to African American students and the way school systems ineffectively address those students' needs is sad. When reading the book you will see your child, or your neighbor's child in the situations and diagnosis that are all too common. I'll talk more about it in the Educator's Corner later. Check for postings after next week. Don't sleep on the value and impact of education in your life and in the lives of your children. That's it for now. It's 2:13 am. I'm out.  Be Easy, Kim D. ********************************************************************* July 15th, 2010 Reflections on change... Change is hard. If you are a passionate person with strong moral convictions, then you commit yourself to everything with which you are involved. The commitment is an inclination that is a resultant by-product of the passion and the morals. It is difficult to navigate commitment in times of change. Since commitment is frequently attached to passion and core beliefs, oftentimes extremes must be introduced in order to redirect efforts or focus - to affect change. This was a whole paragraph to say change is hard and folks get frustrated during times of change. However, the truth is that change is a necessary part of life. When change is warranted, or simply forced upon a situation, folks have to calm themselves and look for the good. In my own life, I calm myself and try to disconnect my emotions (desires, fears, etc.) from the situation, defer to my faith and understanding that all things work together for the good of those who love the Lord, then I move in accordance with the good that I can provide in the situation at hand. This method has never failed me, yet. The good in the situation is not always smoothly aligned with the change. There can be bumps and rough patches. All change is not inherently good. But in times of change that which is good, detached from selfish or self-centered motivations, is consistently and concretely just good and it will eventually, if attended to, result in something positive. Be courageous, be aware, be easy, Kim D. ********************************************************************** July 14th, 2010 Ahhh!!!! Lunch time stress reliever... If school doesn't end soon, I'm gonna chop my eyes off, string cheetos and raw sugar through my ears, and sew my pointer, middle, and baby fingers into the small of my back... all before I pack a grocery cart full of feathers and loose staples and push/walk the cart barefoot, wearing a hooded eskimo coat, and cleats on my elbows, singing repetitiously as loud as my voice will permit - La Cucaracha, spinning one full cirle at the end of each verse... making my way to Nicaragua - to purchase a pen! Yeh, yeh, yeh, I'll take blue or black ink; I'm not difficult... LOL! Ok, tension gone. Crazy cleared. Back to work. Keep calm  ,Kim ********************************************************************* July10th, 2010 Growing up James... NBA basketball is a job! LeBron James did not break a contract; he had the option to choose where he wanted to play. He exercised that option and chose Hoping we all can grow up, too,
Kim ********************************************************************** I watched the BET Awards a few nights ago. All of the entertainers were good. Chris Brown stole the show! P. Diddy rocked; he always appears to have big fun. Alicia Keys was better than average. Tyrese could have been given some of that Debarge time - at least one or two of the Debarge song spots belonged to Teddy :-). Trey songz did pretty good. He sang a song I really like; it's been one of my new favorites for a few weeks now. His video interpretation shows a perspective that we often forget about; at least I did.
BET. For as much as the content on that station unnerves me, I must give them credit for having a platform on which they can introduce and help keep alive African American talent. Chris Brown and Kanye both deserve opportunities to work. I guess El Debarge deserves the same :-). It was good to see Prince, Patti, Luda, T.I., and the song that always gets me out of my seat, singing along - "All I do is win, win, win, no matter what..." Be Easy,
Kim
*********************************************** Happy Father's Day to my wonderfully darling DAD, and all the Big Daddies around the world! Here's a story: My family had a vacation home in Michigan. Our property was on Baseline Road where cars left half mile long dust trails and creative mosaic gravel chips in passing. Once or twice when the dust was clear, I was allowed to steer our big green LTD, and at least once I was responsible for my own acceleration and puff of sand gravel grit.
My exposure to driving at 11 or 12 squelched my fear of the big humming machine and gave me a confidence that could not be held captive by a simple age law. One day while my siblings and I sat in our gold luxury Lincoln across the street from our southside home, the sound and feel of the engine racing beneath my foot was too much to resist. I was 13 or 14 years old. We were waiting for our parents. My little sister said our dad was still eating and our mom was in the bathroom, so we figured there was just enough time to circle the block, at least once, without notice.
I pressed the brake, shifted the gears, and the giant toy began to roll. There were no cars parked on that side of the street, so it was affirmed for me and the sibling gang I headed - I still had it! I was a driving queen. I drove like a pro, they told me, as they yelled instruction meant to be helpful. "Turn right!" "Go faster!" "Whoa! Watch out for the fire hydrant!" My brother, who was far more daring than I, even suggested I drive around the other block, pass the park so our friends could see me.
We made a full circle of the block. As we turned to slip back into the spot we'd left, it was if the world had stood still. Nothing disrupted. No harm done. I put my foot on the brake, threw the thing in park, and our hearts began to settle. We'd made it.
The light was still on in the upstairs upfront room. This meant my parents had not yet even headed down towards the door. By my estimation, there was time for at least one more lap of blocks. So we hit it again. This time my turns were even smoother. I didn't dare amp up the speed because it seemed the car preferred cruise or derby; there was no in between. I chose cruise. I stared at the curb as I rounded the corner. My siblings would have considered a bump against the curb a "fail" in driving. So, as I cleared the curb and the long front of the car floated boat-like into the still clear lane from which it had left, my eye caught one change. At first notice, it seemed there was an extra post on the porch. But I quickly realized it was my father. He was posted motionless near the center of the top step. He watched until I had carefully put the car back into its rightful spot. Then he slowly descended the stairs, crossed the street without looking, walked to the car - to the passenger side where I'd quickly jumped, and opened the door. He had no belt. I had never been hit with a hand or anything other than a belt. I had never been embarrassed in public. All of my punishments were well explained and organized. I was sure his unusual trance-like mode and his presence at the curbside of the car meant sudden death.
There was silence in the car. No one even took a breath. No one in the car, and I'm sure folks in their homes held back as well. Then after a long cowboy-showdown-styled silence, he spoke.
"Slide over."
"Sir?"
"Slide over." He thumped his cigarrette into the gutter. "You wanna drive? Drive."
"Uhh, I don't wanna drive."
"Oh, you want to drive, alright."
"No, Sir, I don't," I pleaded. The tone of my voice begged forgiveness. My father never said anything twice, so when he stood solid at my door, I slowly slid across the middle, back into the driver's seat.
"Let's go." He nodded forward.
"We have to wait for Mama." My sister's face popped between my dad and me. He didn't respond.
"Drive" he commanded, and the car rolled. I paused near the corner expecting to demonstrate my ability to circle the block, but he nodded forward and said in the military commander voice I recognized so well, "Straight."
My father scared the crap out of me that day. He wasn't mean, wasn't explosive, was just thoughtful and calculated. He made me drive straight down the block, across a busy 95th street. It probably took me 15 to 20 minutes to cross that street; there were two lanes on either side of grassy middle. Cars zoomed like planes, all in derby mode. I pleaded and promised to leave the driving to the driver of the family, but he never relented. He gave little 2 to 3 word instructions and rested assured that I would get us across that busy street to our destination, sometimes without him even looking up or out the window.
As we pulled into the small grocery store lot, I felt the steel in my stomach turn to marshmallows. My mind smashed into fragmented thoughts. Wow! What a crazy man. We could have died. I can't drive that good! I could have killed these kids! What was he thinking?!
He stepped out of the car and without a word he went into the store. When he came out the engine was off and I was in the passenger seat. He walked, body aligned with the center of the hood. I prayed. My heart raced. Just as he reached within arms length of the small mounted hood ornament, he veered right. Oh my God. Lesson learned. I never drove that car without at least one of my parent's permission again (even in the country), and though I've owned many fast and high-powered cars, to this day I don't play with the power of motor vehicles.
What's one of your father stories? Tell somebody today.
Be Easy,
Kim D.
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June 18th, 2010 Catching up...
Well... #1 on my list is to make you aware of a documentary titled DuSable to Obama: Chicago's Black Metropolis. It is a fantastic well-researched work that has captured not only most of Chicago's important historic events, but it also includes, live or in rare footage, many of Chicago's most prominent leaders and agitators. You can see it here: http://www.wttw.com/main.taf?p=76,7 . Select to watch the whole video/program which is shown in 5 relatively short segments.
Okay, so, poor Boston :-(. Maybe next time. For now congrats to Kobe and the crew, but next season could someone please capture that sweet little wife of his and lock her camera-hogging tail in a closet until this guy and his teammates get their due praise?! Geez!
Rain and wicked winds in Chicago... nature is just rumbling through the world, trying to tell us to pay attention. Help! Go green, people!
BP is not Katrina - at all. Stop making those silly comparisons. Katrina's aftermath was a matter of dropping off some water and food (at its most elemental function), or removing armed guards from the borders of the state so folks could move themselves to safer situations, letting the people free. BP's aftermath is a series of experiments - no solution yet available. It is a horrible situation!... A not-so-well-thought-out unintended result of greed... a lesson learned... among so many other things... however, it is not Katrina - folks can leave the area to access immediate safety... folks are not trapped in a death pit; they are choosing to exercise the option of fighting for their lifestyle, or life as they know it, not for life itself!...sad and scary situation, though.
Fun, fun, fun... school (work) is out! My daughter and I are having good times; hopefully, my son will be joining us soon ;-). Wooo-hooo!
All the while, I am getting lots of work done, even some writing! Heyyyyyy! I'll share some fiction freewrites soon. Until then...
Enjoy,
Kim D.
**************************************************************************************************************** June 15th, 2010 Skills... Boston vs Lakers. Skills alone do not win championships. Poor Kobe. While a person definitely needs to love him/her self and appreciate his/her skills, a person's best efforts involve helping others to be their best. The more points Kobe scores, the less likely the Lakers will win. Spread the love, Kobe. Go Boston! Doc Rivers incorporates mental strength and faith into his leadership style. What Boston lacks in skills is made up for in heart and smarts. You have to love Boston's Chi-town influence. Tonight we'll see if Boston loses their hustle by foolishly thinking the series is over - cause it isn't over, Big Baby! This should be a good game! (You can tell I'm off work - 2 posts in one day.)
KD
************************************************************************************************************* June 15th, 2010 Countdown to completion... As I countdown the time to completion of school and various things to which I'm committed, I am delighted to find that I'm in love with myself. Still. After and through it all, I am in love with myself. This statement is often confusing for people. Some folks think it's a sign of arrogance or self-absorbtion. Others believe it to be proof of vanity. For me it is a declaration of appreciation for myself and the God that fills me. On occasion I find myself in situations where I prove to myself who I am and what I truly believe about me and life. When I have every excuse to lose or give in yet my values and beliefs win over circumstances or situations, it is a most lovely occurrence. This is not to say that I am without fault, or that I don't disappoint myself sometimes; it is only my little way of thanking God for making my good far outweigh my bad. I want to tell you that the best gift you can give yourself is to work to be an honorable person you can love and appreciate. Then in the quiet time of your reflection, or in the solace of your trials and tribulation you will know that you are worthy of fighting for. And when no one can ease your burdens, or when all of the world fails you, you know you can depend on YOU - which is the God that is within you. I'm telling you it is a beautiful power and strength that you can't help but to love! Appreciate yourself today! Honor You!
Be Easy,
Kim D.
************************************************************************************************************* Please note: Join the March for peace and safety in Chicago's urban community!
Friday, June 18, 2010
7 p.m.
St. Sabina - 7800 S. Throop
The purpose is to send a message that violence will not be tolerated! Folks will use their presence to show their commitment and untiy! Don't punk out - come out; support this effort!
See you soon,
Kim D.
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